Top 5 Michael Scott Quotes

By on April 3, 2013

Michael Scott is the funniest character in the hit television series The Office. He is the awkward manager who just wants to be loved. His life philosophies and views on leadership are side-achingly funny. So, here is to Michael Scott, the worst – and best – role model for workers and managers all over the world.


1. “If I had a gun, with two bullets, and I was in a room with Hitler, Bin Laden and Toby, I would shoot Toby twice.”

Scott 1

This is from an episode in season 6 called The Chump. Toby is Michael Scott’s nemesis in the office and the subject of cringe-worthy ridicule. After Michael Scott says this the office workers then engage in a debate, that includes role play, of the morals of the hypothetical situation and how all three people could be killed with just one bullet.


2. “Would I rather be feared or loved? Easy, both. I want people to be afraid of how much they love me.”

Scott 2

This is a classic Michael Scott line that defines his character. It is from season 2 and an episode called The Fight.


3. “You spend your whole life trying to get people to like you and then you run over one person with your car – not even one of the popular ones – and everybody gets on your case. Doesn’t make any sense.”

Scott 3

This is from season 4 and an episode called The Fun Run. The person Michael Scott ran over was office worker Meredith.


4. “You don’t call retarded people retards. It’s bad taste. You call your friends retards when they are acting retarded.”

Scott 4

This is from an episode called Gay Witch Hunt from season 3. Michael was referring to office worker Oscar and the fact Oscar is gay.


5. “I’m not superstitious… I’m a little stitious”

Scott 5

This is another quote from the episode where Michael hit Meredith with his car. He thought there may be a curse in the office and he was taking responsibility for getting rid of it.

About Damien McGinley

Damien is a professional writer, qualified journalist, father, husband, expert jam-on-toast spreader, rugby fan, and experienced player of games involving dressing up like a knight and building forts. Hails from Belfast.

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